Hoax Devices Catalogue
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ATHF Device
This is one of the few known photos of what might be one of the most dangerous devices known to man. Called the "ATHF Device" or by the nickname "Beantown Bunker Buster" by intelligence agencies around the world, it's more commonly known as "that suspicious looking thing." Because of the extreme lethality of these devices, the only logical course of action upon finding one is to evacuate everyone within 185 miles and then send in remote controlled robots to "disable" the device. A word of extreme caution, that character does appear to be giving you "the finger."
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Banana Phone
This inconspicuous mobile device is actually a sinister weapon of mass destruction disguised as a ordinary cellular phone that you might see anyone on the street talking on. Or in the grocery store, or a not-too-fancy restaurant. However, beneath it's harmless exterior lies something far more Evil. Yes, with a capital "E." When you punch in the key combination 84370089#5672**6625303#0986562*94762#03487255558283645930298465210029489927346*#*##* this will instantly turn every person within a 4 mile radius who is using a cellular phone into a banana. A large, slightly ripe one, but a banana nonetheless. You might ask yourself how something like this is possible, and that would be a damn good question. Luckily there are scientists and stuff.
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Robot Assassin
I know most of you are thinking: "That is a small motor encased in a plastic tube, attached to a potentiometer and a pushswitch, so that some weird electric guitar player can use it to excite his guitar strings and magnetic pickups and generate an annoying electromagnetic whine." YOU ARE SO WRONG! It is actually a sophisticated robot assassin that flies and shoots lasers from its red side. It will track a genetic imprint by detecting genetic dust in the air and can find its target from 2500Km. Once near its target it will engage its Nuclearator (which is a secret super deadly technology that I can't describe here lest it fall into the wrong hands) and Whammo! Target is finished, and no more Frisbees shall fly in a very large radius.
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Potato
Mike notes:
Me and Aidan found this strange but normal looking Potato in our Garden.
After admiring it for a while, it suddenly jumped straight at us, and stole
our socks and pens.
Upon further research we discovered that this type of Potato is of alien
origin, but manufactured in Switzerland, designed to rid mankind of all socks
and pens.
Beware, highly dangerous!
Freedom thanks Mike.
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Obscure and Dangerous Nerd Joke
We all know that nerds are dangerous. Here is proof.
Those of you that don't get it go here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prompt_critical
From Doug. Freedoms thanks Doug.
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Al-BBQaeda
The All-American picnic has been subverted by evil elements, and there might be more than Matchlight and mustard to contend with.
30 November 1999 00:00:00
Machine Gun Sentry Hairdo™
This automated gun wielding hairdo is tried, tested and has already been put to use. Some of our previous customers have already written back to us with some amazing feedback:
"Dee Dee [Ramone] said something and he pulled out a gun and started waving it around. He kept saying, ‘You’re not leaving, nobody’s leaving’," said Johnny Ramone.
Keep those pesky musicians where they belong!
Presented by our resident explosive hair specialist, T.bias of Kraquehaus Productions.
30 November 1999 00:00:00